Girly moments

A few things happened in the last couple of weeks that brought me back to days I thought to be well and gone.

1. Girly crush.
Do you remember when you were at school and desperately wanted to be friends with this really really cool girl (read 'boy' if you are a man)? Remember the dorky attempts to look interesting and worth talking to? The tiny little steps towards a full conversation, trying to avoid appearing too needy? Well, I am having a girl crush right now. At my dear ripe old age.

I so want this gal to be my friend, I am doing it all wrong. I make a constant fool of myself, in my full clumsy splendour (I keep dropping objects, braking utensils.. the usual). I say all the wrong things. And sound as odd as I can be. I almost asked her out for drinks, then felt inappropriate and left it.

How can this possibly be? How can a professional, semi-adjusted 30-something still worry about rejection? And not even by a man?? Why am I so scared of asking an intelligent, successful, inspiring, funny, articulate woman out?
Gulp!

2. Girly giggles.
Out with some girlfriends, I went to order a boring tomorrow-is-a-school-day pineapple juice and found myself hit on by a cute 20-year old American barman. I was so surprised, I actually started giggling like some kind of idiot. When he offered to buy me a proper drink, and then smiled in my direction while I was discussing cleaning agents with the ladies, I went through all the obvious uncomfortable moves: hair-touching, mouth-covering, wedding-band wiggling. At the end of the evening, the only possible way out was straight and fast through the exit. No looking back.
What a loser.. (Me that is)

3. Girly night.
At the end of what felt like a 20-hour work day, I packed my bag and directed my fed-up self towards a busy bar. On the spur of the moment, two friends joined me for an impromptu drink that ended up into a girly boozy night. Weekend plans, life-changing decisions, sex accounts, mild gossip, unrequested declarations of friendship (sorry I made you feel uncomfortable)... the whole shebang. The morning after was slightly painful, but I still managed to go for a run.
Nice.