Up at 3 am again. Thinking of crossroads, possibilities and opportunities. Of errors past and errors future. Of choices, decisions, indecisions. Of the ones we lost, and the ones we should hold on to. Of love given, of love taken, of love never to be returned. Of too many cigarettes. Of thoughts spoken and unspoken. Of hearts broken, mended and broken again. Of fear and bravery. Of friends to miss and long for. Of responsibility and duty. Of time rushing by. Of answers looking for a question. Of beautiful numbers that build order from chaos. Of neuroses. Of desire. Of impossible dreams. Of pain and hurt. Of new ends and old beginnings. Of words, words, words, words. Of life having this bad habit of adding another year to your age. Of happy loneliness. Of one way streets. Of blue socks in a white washing. Of a desk still to be cleared. Of goodbyes. Of things not quite going according to plan. Of wanting to jump. Of knowing when you are losing. Of change. Of boxes yet to be unpacked. Of wishing I didn't suffer from insomnia.
Then, I saw a blue dawn over the city.
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